Comedy in L.A. with Ray Romano

     Just took a trip out to L.A. and had a super time.  My husband, Bert and I, planned the trip to see our children who are in L.A. and San Francisco respectively.  However, we did spend some time at The Comedy Magic Club in Hermosa Beach because my husband is a friend of the manager Richie Barrett.  Our son Steven, who is also a comedian, joined.  (Of course that was the best part for me.)

     Richie was an awesome host and made us feel very much at home.  We ate dinner in his company in a private room and really received the super treatment.  It was a special thrill for our son because he is relatively new to the comedy scene and he got a real bird's eye view of backstage.

    As is customary to the Comedy Magic Club the stars were out.  Although I have met most "wow" comedians from their visits to Chicago, I had never met Ray Romano and he made a special guest visit that evening.  It just so happened that there was a benefit that night and the audience was all women.  Believe me, I wanted to be on that stage but Ray handled the same sex crowd with finesse.  They loved him!

      We exited when Ray's portion of the show was over.  On the way out, I passed him in the hallway and shook his hand.  He was very gracious and I told him I was big fan of his show that still airs daily.  If you want to know what Ray Romano is really like - watch "Everybody Loves Raymond."  At first glance, it does seem to provide a true reflection.

"Comedy Mom!" 

A Humor Book That Even Your Dog Will Like!

Somebody was very busy this morning!

Mom Stories - "Mom, Who Am I?"

   I don’t know what goes on in kindergarten but I can tell these kids are doing a heck of a lot more than me when I was five.  I know that “David” was the longest name I’d ever seen and I still had no idea was “M,N,L,O,P” was when I entered first grade.  Kids today are reading at a third grade level at a time when my father would simply look at me and say, “Don’t flunk sandbox.”

            This was never more apparent to me the day Christine came home from kindergarten and said, “Mom.  We’re going to play a game.  Standing in a white lace dress and ankle socks, Christine looked like an angel and she spoke with the innocence of someone who didn’t know they were about to challenge the incredible competitive character known as “Mommy.”  Christine continued in a soft voice.  “I’m going think of something in the world and you get three guesses to figure out what I’m thinking of.”  Maybe this heavenly being knew a little more about playing the big slots than I gave her credit for.  It seemed that the “world” is a pretty big playing field and the human component of “thinking” could not be scored in a fair and honest manner.    I became aware that the odds of winning were stacked in her favor.

            I began to guess.  “Christine, you’re thinking of your big red doll.”  “No!”  “Christine, you’re thinking of your baby doll.”  “No!”  “Christine you’re thinking of that lamp right over there.”  “No!”   I’d lost – but by how much?   I had to know now.  “Christine, what may I ask were you thinking about?”  Christine looked at me in the eyes as if she was pulling in her poker chips.  …. “Mount Fuji!”  … I wasn’t even close.  “Christine?”  “What.”  “I want to talk to your teacher.”

A Female Comedian's Insight - Understanding Your Children's Gifts

I understand it now. I understand how to recognize a unique "gift" within oneself. After years of soul searching I have been able to share my insights with my children and other adults. I find it funny that a personal gift should be so difficult to recognize. To our friends it can be quite apparent. It is best to listen to friends and family as they praise our uniqueness. It is difficult for us to recognize our own gift because we assume everyone shares our talents.

With my own children I was always on the lookout for clues. It was a daily fun exercise to notice repeated patterns of actions or words that were unique to each child. My oldest son, Brendan, was only six years old the first time he asked me, "Mom, what do you think of black holes?" Was I supposed to be thinking of black holes? My heart raced for a correct answer that wouldn't scar him with my lack of knowledge on the subject. Black hole questions were followed by comet and constellation questions. None of my other children were that inquisitive of the night sky. Today Brendan is an astrophysicist.
Our senior babysitter noticed our second son's gift when he was only 11 months old. "This kid is hilarious and he knows just how to make you laugh. He is the funniest baby I have ever seen." Steven established a pattern of making us laugh to tears. Today he lives in Los Angeles and is in an internship program for comedy sketch writing.

Our youngest, Christine, was a quick study. At nine years old she would take graph paper and draw sketches of the interior of her room. Every piece of furniture was measured and labeled. I said, "Christine, are you doing that for school?" Christine used graph paper for fun! Being a "math-o-phobic", I knew the clues were adding up quickly. Christine is now in San Francisco getting stellar grades. She is majoring in Architecture.

In retrospect I see my own life story was formed by the time I was eight. My parents signed me up for piano lessons and I began to teach myself to sing. I didn't stop singing. I started dancing and twirling and I loved making people laugh with my miniature shows. My older sister started bringing me to audition at community plays. Because of my lack of voice and dance training I did not get the parts. I worried I had no special talent. Fifteen years later, I walked on to the standup comedy stage of Zanies Comedy Club in Chicago as a new talent. Within minutes I experienced the joy of performing and making people laugh. I discovered my gift and knew I was home.

Sally Edwards is a professional Corporate Comedian who tours nationally. Sally Edwards' clean comedy has been featured on A&E's "Comedy on the Road" and Showtime's "Comedy Club Network."

Couch Stories

    STANDUP COMEDIANS AND COUCH STORIES

    The unfortunate adventures that standup comedians experience over the years are often referred to as “couch stories.” They generally contain elements of pain and embarrassment for the performer and repeating them has a cathartic effect until they become funny and tolerable.  A good story telling comedian knows that pain becomes funny over time.  A great story is memorable gold when riffing on the couch with a talk show host should that welcome opportunity arise.

    One of my favorite couch stories concerns a very talented comedian by the name of “Gilbert Gottfried.”  (Now a favorite face on the line up of roasters as seen on “Comedy Central.”) 

     Gilbert is a very unique comedian from New York who delivers his material in a whiny voice and squinted eyes.  What is most unique, however, is his very original material based on subject matter that originates somewhere far off in left field.  Gilbert Gottfried’s appearance is as unique as the jokes he tells.  His height and weight border petite.

  I was a bit star struck driving up to Milwaukee where I would be performing with Gilbert at The Comedy Café – an intimate room where the crowds are always pumped and ready to laugh.  Gilbert is a true talent and I knew the three days of performing with him were going to be top-notch.  One of the thrills of being a comedian is being able to work with people whose comedy I admire. 

 “Hi.  How are ya’.  Hi, how are ya’.  Nice to meet chu.  Good.  Good.”  The room was filled to standing room only as I tried to work my way to the green room of The Comedy Café that evening.  Gilbert Gottfried had also arrived and was trying to part the waves of adoring fans.  His intended goal was also to reach the same door leading to the stairs that would take him down the long narrow hall to the green room.  Head down, eyes squinting, he rarely made eye contact of those he met. 

     Reaching the swinging door we bumped into each other long enough for me to say, “Hi Gilbert.  I’m Sally and I’ll be your opening act tonight.”  …  “Hi.  Very nice.  Pleasure to meet chu.  Good.  Good.”  And those were the only words we exchanged that week.  He seemed to neither see nor hear me when I ran into him again and again over the course of three days.

     As a young comedian, it is very exciting to know that your act is being watched by someone in the business you admire.  It is also in the best interest of the headliner (the “star” of the show or closing act) to watch his or her opening act to ensure that they do not repeat the same premises and/or jokes to the same audience.  It is a type of self-preservation.  As a headliner, it is humiliating to bring up a topic that your opening act has explored.  It is an embarrassment to repeat subject matter and reduces perceived professionalism.

     Gilbert Gottfried never watched my act.  He wasn’t worried that I’d bring up any of his original and entirely bizarre premises.  He wasn’t worried that I might be so funny that he could not follow me.  He never made an effort to see my show or in engage in friendly conversation with me.  I was invisible.

    Gilbert went on stage and although he started slow and steady, he reeled the audience in with his incredible imagination.  He talked about the bizarre and he intrigued his audience as they listened to his story about how he went outside one morning and found a turtle in the radiator of his car. Anything is possible in Gilbert Gottfried’s world.   As he exited the stage, two very tall big breasted blondes became his moveable bookends as he made his way directly past me to the narrow hallway that took him back to the greenroom.

     It had been three days since Gilbert Gottfried had acknowledged me as an acquaintance and fellow performer.  In three days, I grew tired of being invisible and I decided it was time for a prank that would shake Gilbert Gottfried out of his big boobed, blonde stupor.

    Saturday night I approached Gilbert in the green room.  He looked at me as if he was seeing me for the first time.  I said, “Gilbert, I’ve been opening for you all week.”  ….  “Ah, yeah.”  “Gilbert, I continued.  Have you watched any of my shows?”  …. “Ah no.  I haven’t had a chance to get up there.”  “Well Gilbert, you know that bit that you have about finding a turtle in the radiator of your car?”  …. “Yeah.”  … “Well I do a bit about finding a turtle in the radiator of MY CAR!” 

   The screaming started.  Gilbert Gottfried grabbed his chest and fell forward yelling, “Oh my god.  No!  Tell me – No!   It’s not true!  It can’t be!  Oh my god!  Oh my god!” …  “Gilbert!”   He raised his head as he neared a genuflecting position.  “Gilbert, I said. It’s O.K.   I’m just kidding.”

ComedyBySally.com

Clean Comedy Events for Women's Groups with Keynote Speaker Sally Edwards

It has been a wonderful week booking Clean Comedy Events for Women's Groups.  Clean comedy that is non-offensive allows women to laugh without the fear of embarrassment.  We have a great time and everyone is a winner!  Upcoming Clean Comedy Events for Women's Groups include:

Catholic Women's League of Rockford - Sept. 18th - Keynote Speaker and Comedian

St. John Neumann, St. Charles, IL - September 27th - Keynote Speaker and Comedian

St. John United Methodist Church, Louisville Kentucky:  Nov. 14th - Keynote Speaker and Comedian

Christ Community Church, St. Charles, IL - Dec. 14th - Keynote Speaker and Comedian

Keynote Speaker and Comedian Sally Edwards

Clean Comedy for Women - Sally Edwards' Keynote Speaker

http://ComedyBySally.com

Comedy and Kids

When kids are growing up, writing comedy becomes quite effortless.  The comedy writes itself.  Here is my son Steven, in the company of our cat, Scooter.  They both broke their legs during the summer and recuperated together.  Believe me, the broken legs did not slow either of them down!  When they were both in the backyard I thought to myself, "What a sight!  Let's hope no one calls child services!

http://comedybysally.com

Pets are great companions and their company makes every day easier and brighter.

France - Culture vs. Concrete

Don't misunderstand me - culture rocks!  Or do I mean a lot of culture is made of rocks, marble and concrete.

The good news is that we just returned safely from a trip to Paris.  The unfortunate news is that I traveled to France as a "debt" I owed to my husband who was kind enough to move from a Chicago suburb to a small town  that is one hour away from his place of work in downtown Chicago.  Bert runs Zanies in Chicago.  Thank goodness we both love to laugh.  It's saved our marriage, again, and again and again.

I appreciate Paris and all that it stands for but a visit wasn't necessary.  I'm afraid of airplanes and heights and I dread big cities because of the noise and overcrowding.  You'd think that would be a lifelong argument to not make the trip but Bert had romantic ideas from watching all those black and white movies that he loves so much.  He just forgot that I wasn't in any of them.

I have also become an "anti-hoarder."  After watching how the world works for so many years, I have very little appreciation for the material world.  Walking past shop after shop, after Parisian shop, I knew the costly and beautifully made clothes were wasted on this tourist.  Ever since our move to a small town I can't bear to go shopping.  I imagine every trinket for sale in a plastic garbage bag as it appeared when I donated and/or threw it out when I lightened the load in our new house.

Bert is obsessed with clothes.  He dresses well and puts on a great appearance.  We were the odd couple of this new black and white movie.

The best part of the days were the outstanding restaurants where we ate magnificent dinners.  I'd like to say there was no downside to this one however the downside is apparent the moment you enter the city.  Parisians are thin and they look good!  How do they do it?  We were now playing the part of the Fat Americans in our movie.  Well, it turns out they smoke quite a lot.  That fit well into the scene if our black and white came out in 1944.

What's important to me now is a healthy and loving family and making other people in the world feel good.  There's no store or monument for that.  It's building from the inside out.  I like to do it in green fields surrounded by rescue dogs or standing on stage and delivering stand up comedy that makes people laugh to tears.  My entire movie is in color and I love every minute of it!

Ballroom Dancing With the Comedian!

           This past weekend I signed up for a private ballroom dance lesson.  Let’s check that right off the bucket list. 

           I’ve always loved to dance and oddly enough the first song I fell in love with was “Let Me Entertain You” from the striptease move “Gypsy” when I was just eight years old.  I sang the heck out of that song and practiced a lot of dance moves with it too.  I wonder how bizarre my family thought it was that I’d fallen in love with such a provocative song.  Of course little “June” in the movie sang it when she was five in a white dress with a petticoat and patent leather shoes.  Wait a minute, who let me watch “Gypsy” anyway?  That wasn’t the all-girl Catholic school way.

          I’ve loved dancing all my life and I’ve taken lessons in tap, jazz, ballet and acrobatics.  The one thing I always pined for was ballroom dancing.  I always wondered where those people learned to dance with one another.  When I was in jazz class, I’d see advanced dancers carrying each other through the air.  I always thought, “I want a little piece of that!”

           Last week, I decided to put my thoughts into action after being inspired by “Dancing With the Stars.”  If this TV show is so popular, they’re must be a way to go after this dream.  I googled my way to ballroom dance instruction that looked reputable and I was on my way.  On Friday, I had my first private ballroom dance lesson.

           I’ve always wanted to learn how to dance with a guy who has exceptional rhythm.  Although my husband is interested in learning ballroom, I wanted to take the first class alone.  My husband’s ability to dance-“not” is well documented in my show.

           To say that I didn’t know how to dress for ballroom dancing instruction is an understatement.  Growing up Catholic makes me always reach for plaid.  Sure enough, I arrived in a plaid shirt, goofy work-out pants and yesterday’s horrible black heels.  My ballroom dance instructor, “Cinnamon” must have taken lessons in poker face because as odd as I looked he kept a straight face.  Not easy to do for a black ultra-cool black dude with shades and bling that looked like he could have graced the cover of Ebony Magazine.  When we met he didn’t crack a smile.  I could read the “Oh my god, is this the best they can give me” look that was written all over his face.  When we turned to look in the mirror, the sight was so bizarre I wanted to make it better by promising to wear a Cat Woman suit the next week.  Poor Cinnamon - I knew I’d make it up to him with my ability to “catch on.”

           Cinnamon asked me what  type of music I liked.  I’m thinking  “oldies”and “ Lady Gaga”.  I refused to let my teeny bopper mentality show and I blurted out  “Usher.”  Ha!  I remember being introduced on stage to an Usher song that really made me want to dance.  That counts!

           The lesson was awesome.  Dancing with a man who has rhythm (a black man who has rhythm – super extra bonus points!) was a dream.  It was everything I could imagine – fun, challenging and yet effortless.  Dancing on a cloud is a just description.  As Cinnamon danced he started to smile and repeatedly said “Thank You” as I picked up his moves after only one demonstration.  And best of all, he gave me the ultimate black dancer’s compliment, “Sally, you’ve a got a little black in you.”  Knock me over with feather!  I’d been working for a compliment like that since Gypsy Rose Lee.

           I left the ballroom lesson feeling a true sense of accomplishment.  But like all dreams, it’s time to wake up.  My next dancing lesson includes a challenging (challenged?) and adorable partner – my husband Bert.  Cinnamon, I bet you thought you’d seen everything when I arrived in my goofy plaid shirt and Capri pajama-like pants.  There’s another half to this cool-bound dance lady.  You better work on that poker face.  You’re gonna need it!

The Comedy Competition - You Gotta Love 'Em

  Last night I performed in a comedy competition - "The World Series of Comedy" - at Zanies in St. Charles, IL.  Sixteen comedians took the stage to win fabulous bookings, including advancement to Las Vegas.  Some comics flew from as far away as Washington (yes - the state!) to perform in this battle of hilarity for the opportunity to simply work more. (Yes - comedians love their craft that much.)  I had a super time.

   My reason for entering the competition was not for an opportunity to win.  Yes.  I said it.  Because I perform a one-person comedy show, I was not trying to win the prize of a middle spot at various comedy clubs.  And, based on my history of my competition abilities I was not worried about winning the grand prize.  (Some thrive on the competition aspect.  I generally avoid competitive comedy.)  I entered the competition because I wanted a personal challenge.  I wanted to stay "fresh" over the summer months when my bookings ebb with the school year calendar.

  To prepare for the competition, I performed a five minute set one week ago on the St. Charles comedy stage.  This guest set was to get the wheels back in motion.  My daughter said, "Yes Mom.  I could see you thinking."  Mission accomplished.

  Four days later, I went to "Laff Out Loud" in Schaumburg for another five minute "practice" set.  I was surrounded primarily by new talents.  The energy of these brand new comedians was amazing.  Most went on stage "raw" with new jokes that screamed "This is what I think is funny."  The laughs were minimal and most of the material was blue (i.e. dirty).  However, the energy among the comedians was new and hopeful.  It gave me a great push to polish my set.

  And this brings us to Wednesday night's competition.  With two sets of preparation, I was back on my game.  The audience was fantastic.  I reached my goal of making a great stride forward as I prepare for my corporate bookings which seem to wake from a deep slumber in the fall.  I won a personal prize of accomplishment and that, to me, is the greatest win of all!